Delightful Dating – Part One

In the first part of this article, we take a look at the different types of dating and some of the places that are always a winner to go.

Date:    A way of getting to know another person by spending time with them on a planned outing or activity.  Single people date singles; married people date their mates; married people date others and get into more trouble than it is worth.

More Than One Type of Date... 

A date is not necessarily just a date.  Our motivations for going out with someone can differ from situation to situation.  Gender also plays an important part due to the fact that men and women are not motivated in exactly the same way. 

Following is a brief description of various types of dates.  Once you have looked them over, you will note that we have expanded upon them further down the page.  Enjoy! 

Blind Dates:  This term refers to a date set up by a mutual friend(s).  Unless some serious matchmaking is involved, it is generally understood that nothing serious is expected to happen as a result.  Of all the types of dates, this is the one where both parties have the least information about each other, if any. 

First Dates:  Now that you’ve met someone and have scheduled your first date together, what will you do and where will you go?  Check out our helpful ideas below. 

Fun Dates:  Be careful here.  The definition of this type of date varies widely between men and women.  Women think of fun dates as an evening of letting one’s hair down, laughing a lot, dancing the night away, or doing something totally unique to their experience like white water rafting.  Conversely, guys think of fun dates as all of the above with the biggest “fun” happening somewhere at the end of the date.  They can’t help it.  They’re predators.  God made them that way. 

Internet Dates:  This new form of dating is revolutionizing the way people meet, fall in love, and begin permanent relationships.  Once two people connect on the net, an actual face-to-face meeting may not be too far behind.  Be sure to read the “Seven Rules for Offline Meetings” below as well as some helpful thoughts. 

Serious Dates:  There comes a point in every person’s life (sometimes, more than once) when the decision is made to move from the single position to having a permanent primary relationship.  This is the person who doesn’t do second dates if the first one didn’t result in a switch being turned on. 

Third Dates:  Every female knows what this date is all about.  Our current cultural trend is for guys to strongly indicate their desire for sexual intimacy by the third date.  Keep in mind that, although women expect men to make this request, they are not always willing to comply. 

Un-Dates:  This has to do with how you get out of a date or confront someone you’ve been dating with the news that you would rather not see them anymore.

Going In With Both Eyes Closed—The Blind Date... 

The key word here is “non-commitment.” When accepting this kind of a date (to either appease a match-making friend or satisfy one’s curiosity about another person you’ve not yet actually met), be sure that you go into it committed to not committing to anything.  Treat it as a singular event to have some fun and have a nice time with another person.  Barring the possibility that your date will turn out to be the “date from hell,” you can enjoy sharing both mutual interests and things not in common with each other even if it seems obvious from the beginning that there is no real attraction.

Furthermore, do not (DO NOT) try to get the other person to commit to a second date until after the first date has had a chance to sink in for at least twenty-four hours.  It not only puts the other person on the spot if they are not interested in pursuing a relationship with you, but will also save you the embarrassment of being told on the spot that there is really no interest on the other your person’s part.  If a second date is something both of you would be interested in, save that for a phone conversation or an e-mail message a few days later.  That way, you can go into it with both of you feeling good about it and, this time, with both eyes open.

It’s A Date!--The First Date... 

Here are some unique first date ideas that will keep you out of the “dinner and a movie rut” and set your first date apart from the rest: 

A Picnic In The Park:  Eliminate the pressure of a Saturday night date by enjoying the relaxed atmosphere of a public park on a Sunday afternoon. Pack a basket of “finger foods” like cheese, fruit, crackers and chocolates and a chilled bottle of sparkling cider (alcoholic beverages are illegal in most city and state parks).  For that extra special touch include china plates, crystal glasses and cloth napkins. In fact, some shopping mall stores carry both basket and backpack outfits equipped with these items.  The two of you can search out the perfect spot beneath a shade tree to enjoy your picnic, do some people watching, and get to know each other. 

Root For The Home Team:  Sporting events are a great place to have a great time and provide a fun and relaxed atmosphere for a first date. No matter what the season, there’s always something going on in the world of sports and if the cost of tickets to a professional game isn’t in your budget, high school, college and minor league games are just as much fun. 

Window Shopping:  You can stroll for hours in a shopping mall or a city’s shopping district while stopping here and there for a cup of coffee or an ice cream cone. And if you get tired of just looking in the windows, there’s always browsing through the racks at a music store, trying on hats and wasting a few quarters in a video arcade. 

Be Tourists For A Day:  Most of us live near attractions that people travel miles to see and we’ve never taken the time to visit them ourselves. Historical monuments, zoos, amusement parks, and state parks are just a few of the possibilities and great places to meet. These attractions offer plenty of things to talk about in case of a lull in the conversation and you can even pick up a souvenir of a memorable first date. 

Visit A Museum:  Art, Natural History, American History; pick a subject and the chances are that there’s a museum dedicated to it. If you and your date have a common interest (or both of you want to see something new), visit a museum together and enjoy the exhibits. Many museums also offer special shows, presentations and lectures that can provide a unique first date experience.